tag:iworldband.org,2005:/blogs/fresh-revelationFRESH REVELATION2024-03-24T10:36:08-04:00jacob of the iWorldbandfalsetag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73716722024-03-24T10:36:08-04:002024-03-26T07:16:58-04:00Life's Purpose<p>Here are some things to consider…</p><p>It’s like you told me when I came in.. “You don’t have a choice” You drink or drug or both. I think it’s safe to say we are ultimately created for good purpose, as opposed to bad purpose. We were created to live. After all, its called LIFE not death. God is Truth and he created us.<span> </span></p><p>In addiction we were living day to day having accepted drinking and or drugging as an occupation. Sound too strong, think again. We had no real thought about the future or the past simply “ LET’S PARTY! “ until it gets to be fun with trouble, then just trouble then incomprehensible demoralization, then a horribly isolated loneliness settled down kinda thing, then the bitter end. Hummm….If your somewhere in this mix, you may not realize the outcome, but WE do because we have stepped over many bodies to keep our seat here.</p><p>You must put down those things that you picked up to keep yourself under that dark spiritual control. You can’t do it alone! You need help! That’s where we come in. We are everywhere around the world willing to help for free, all you have to do is come and join with us.<span> </span></p><p>Believe it or not WE need you! No matter where your at, no matter what your condition. You will be instantly accepted among our ranks for WE are the army of the broken hearted. WE can and will teach you how to live LIFE, rather than endure death but, and here the big question… Will You Let Us?<span> </span></p><p>Answering yes to this question seems like a no brainer, yet many fail to make this critical decision. Why is this? The alluring, siren call of dark spiritual power. Seemingly against all odds it wins out especially with those of us worn down by decades of answering the call to addiction. Filled with a past full of regret, guilt, shame and unforgiveness, it is no wonder we believe God will never forgive us for what we have done.<span> </span></p><p>That my friends is the #1 lie that will keep you in bondage for the rest of your li'doG Rehabilitation and AA to the rescue to bring you out from the fog.</p><p>God's Grace rehabilitation and AA to the rescue</p><p>Even that is no guarantee but IF you stay with us and do what we do, we will with God’s help reveal to you your true life fulfilling divine purpose for being here on earth.<span> </span></p><p>Don’t believe me, fine, but consider this…</p><p>Why not come with us, what do you have to lose?</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br> </p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73702432024-03-21T06:50:50-04:002024-03-21T06:52:53-04:00Not Hurting Anyone?<p>RIGHT… your alcoholism effects everybody, especially those you SHOULD “Love” the most.<span> </span></p><p>Lets take this thinking a bit further.<span> </span></p><p>You, most likely, had been effected by someone else’s alcoholism. Brought to you usually through family first, then “friends”. Maybe a better term might be drinking buddies. I might add here, those folks were probably sought out by you in your addiction.</p><p>The good news is that when the drinking and drugging stop, the odds of a life free of this fatal addiction carrying forward through the family is dramatically improved. Not to say you won’t see it in future generations, because it seems to be a genetic trait but, with abstinence, there is real hope of avoidance for even potential alcoholics.</p><p>Take it from us…</p><p>Your health and the well-being of your family is far better off without the drink, than with it.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73679272024-03-16T05:01:08-04:002024-03-16T05:31:05-04:00First Meeting<p>I remember that night in a little church basement in West Virginia. I sat in the back of the room wondering why I was there, but knowing I had to be. I don’t remember a single word they said. Just wanted the thing to be over. When it finally was, I bolted for the exit and this older lady leaped over a few tables and threw her arms around me before I could get to the door. She stuck her old coffee breath in my face and said “keep coming back we’re gonna love you till you love yourself.”</p><p>Sitting here today, thirty seven sober years later I have to smile. What a profound statement. It was always about Love, but when your trying to kill yourself with alcohol and drugs and you don’t even know it, your a long, long way away from Love!<span> </span></p><p>Then. there was so much to learn about myself, you an especially Him. I was thinking this morning of a homeless center I use to go to below Tampa under seventy-seven. How I loved going there to see, speak with and perform for everyone. Twenty-four years now as a traveling evangelistic, recovery minstrel, loving the unlovable of which I was chief. What a ride it has been … so far</p><p> …but for the Grace of God</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73669192024-03-14T06:49:47-04:002024-03-14T06:49:47-04:00The New Drug<p>Speaking with a friend in the rooms the other day, he explained to me that he wanted to try fentanyl.<span> </span></p><p>Yes folks it’s still true, insanity is still alive and well in the rooms of recovery!<span> </span></p><p>I could go on and on and on about how devastating this drug has been to my family, our fellowship and world society at large. Talking to a professional in the recovery industry a few months ago, he explained to me that where he worked, when folks come in off the street into intake, they are asked what was their drug of choice. No matter what they say, nearly all test positive for fentanyl. The cartels have figured it out… cheaper and more addictive. Now however, I<span> </span>understand that they have added “tranq” (xylazine) to the mix making narcan ineffective, for tranq is not an opioid.</p><p>What does all this mean?</p><p>It means your neighborhood friendly dope dealer is pushing death, not drugs. It means they don’t know what their selling you. They never ever really did. They are dope dealers… HELLO!<span> </span></p><p>If your NOT in recovery, it’s time to come in. If you ARE in recovery, STAY! Going back out today is like playing a game of Russian roulette with the house odds stacked against you… BIG TIME!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73579652024-02-27T07:10:07-05:002024-02-27T07:10:07-05:00It Works<p>It works because it’s the truth. The spiritual principles outlined in the twelve steps are not new. Originally interpreted by the Christian Oxford Group. They have been handed down to us by the Lord himself, two thousand years ago.</p><p>Here’s the abridged scriptural type version..</p><p>Born of a sin nature, we all fall short of the glory of God. ( Powerlessness )</p><p>A self directed life doesn’t work. ( Unmanageability )</p><p>Love God with everything you’ve got. Love your neighbor as you love yourself. ( Change everything by turning it all over )</p><p>Get honest with yourself and confess your “Sins” to your brother. ( Clear up the wreckage of the past)</p><p>Ask for forgiveness. ( Seven times Seventy )</p><p>Strength is found in weakness. Testify what God has done for you. ( Ten, Eleven and Twelve )</p><p>F.Y.I.<span> </span>Don’t like religion, nether did Jesus. After all the religious of the time murdered Him!</p><p>Please don’t get me wrong, I am so thankful for Bill and Bob and the first 100 that developed the book. Alcoholic Anonymous, or if you will, “God for Dummies”. It sure worked for this dummy! However, I know now the author and inspiration for the twelve steps was Christ himself, because I have continued to seek the truth.<span> </span></p><p>It’s critically important for you to understand this! Working the steps can and will improve your life here on earth but, without ACCEPTING Christ you will not achieve eternal life in heaven. Let face it folks, that life beyond our wildest dreams is the real prize we are all looking for, whether we know it or not.<span> </span></p><p>REMEMBER…</p><p>Acceptance is the answer to all our problems!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73566092024-02-24T06:51:42-05:002024-02-24T06:56:51-05:00Another Bozo on the Bus<p>Yes, indeed I am!</p><p>Human, born of a “ sin nature.” Almost lost my life following darkness. By God’s Blessed Grace, here on this bus of recovery with all the rest just like me. Wondering will I muster enough faith to stay in my seat with everyone else or, will I get off at the next bump in the road and stumble my way alone in the dark world for twenty years like last time?</p><p>Hummmm?</p><p>I ask myself the big question…</p><p>Where is this bus going?<span> </span></p><p>Is this bus really gonna take me where everyone sezs it will? Take me to a place beyond my wildest dreams?<span> </span></p><p>…sup wit dat?</p><p>Speaking as someone who has been on that bus for thirty-seven years, I can tell you the answer is YES! Simple but not easy yet, over time, IF you stay and do the work and accept life on life’s terms, here is what you will experience. A wonder-filled existence here on earth with amazing new freedom and a true divine inner-purpose of peace, serenity and Love.</p><p>Believe it or not.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73547142024-02-21T05:23:45-05:002024-02-21T05:23:46-05:00One an Done<p>What I knew when I came in was…“ If I picked up the one thing I would lose everything.”</p><p>Seems crazy but for us it’s reality. The phenomenon of craving sets the thing in motion. Over time, once we start our addiction, everything else goes away. My second wife never saw me drink. She did not want me going to AA. What she didn’t understand was I needed to go, because if I did not, SHE was going to be going away, along with everything else!</p><p>When we come into the rooms, fresh from our addiction, our life situation’s are usually pretty bleak. The reason, simply put, is that we no longer love ourselves and we cannot give away something we haven’t got. All SEEMS lost at that point.</p><p>The good news in recovery is that we are dealing with a spiritual malady. Coming in and becoming sober, we begin to awaken to a loving God. No longer directed by that lower power of hate that controlled our inebriated lives for so many years. If we are willing, we can receive the blessed forgiveness we so desperately need through the process of the steps to right our broken lives.</p><p>What I did not know when I came in was…</p><p>“ Put down the one thing and you can regain everything worth retaining.”</p><p>Amazing!</p><p>Don’t believe me? Just look around the rooms at those with time, who actually work the program. You can see the hope your looking for in the eyes of all the others who are just like you.<span> </span></p><p>Like they say…</p><p><span> </span>“ If you want what we have, just do what we do.” Don’t worry God will take care of all the rest.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73541132024-02-20T05:45:14-05:002024-02-20T05:45:14-05:00Bottom or Beginning<p>Responsibility is a big word. After having been in recovery for a while, that word has become even bigger!<span> </span></p><p>The way of responsibility and the pursuit of it creates our new life in recovery. The life beyond our wildest dreams if you will. Tied closely with honesty, responsibility is the true connection with our Higher power. It is a right living, ongoing, mindful contact with God for love of self and love of others. Essentially over time allowing us to return to what we really are… Love.</p><p>The big book talks a lot about putting<span> </span>too much responsibility on others for things we should be doing for ourselves. Easy to do in addiction, for we are too inebriated to accomplish the task of living. Yet now that we are sober, It is so important for us to allow others, whether in the program or not, to find their bottom. For as we all know, until that happens, there is no realization of a serious life problem, thus nothing needs changing.<span> </span></p><p>The real gut level understanding of this principle of a God directed life, is revealed to all of us over time by staying responsible in the program. For it is through time in recovery that we will understand and learn by God’s Grace, our “bottom’s” have indeed given us the greatest gift we have ever received. Namely, the way of true Divine life purpose here on earth by following the twelve steps and through the will of God, gaining that realization of the reality of everlasting life with our Lord in heaven.<span> </span></p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73510802024-02-14T05:54:16-05:002024-02-14T06:04:53-05:00Valentine's Day<p>Chairing the meeting tonight. I guess we’ll talk about Love. It’s all about Love in recovery. Learning to love yourself again. Loving others and allowing them to love you.<span> </span></p><p>I always wondered why everyone left me in late addiction. It was like they said in the book “You can’t give away something you haven’t got.” Of real Love, I had none at that time, but by staying, doing the work and allowing God and the fellowship, Love returned.<span> You gotta have Love to Love ..right?</span></p><p>You know God is Love and Love created you, therefore, whether you know it or not…YOU are Love</p><p>Like coming home, it always feels so right to return to who you are. Leaving that very unnatural, isolating and hate filled world of addiction an alcoholism to return, over time, to that super natural way of true love.</p><p>Yeah…they say it just doesn’t get any better, but the cool thing is, that in AA, If you stay, it will!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73478502024-02-08T04:07:38-05:002024-02-08T04:07:39-05:00Good Report!<p>Another visit to the cancer center. Glad to report I will be here a little longer. They said the Shingles treatment knocked me down and although I am still pretty anemic, they feel I’m coming back. That’s good news for me, because I have a lot more I need to get accomplished.<span> </span></p><p>Busy today as every day. Lots of comings and goings. By God’s Grace, hopefully, I will be able to travel and speak this Saturday. The joy of my life, sharing the amazing Grace and Love of Christ with my worldwide recovery family. Without a doubt, the greatest gift I have ever received, the God directed ability to give it away.<span> </span></p><p>So very grateful!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73445582024-02-02T06:15:42-05:002024-02-02T06:15:42-05:00All Good<p>It’s all good, but the cancer has been acting up. I don’t know what the symptoms mean, but I’ll find out soon when I return to the health center.<span> </span></p><p>Sitting here this morning, hoping this is not the beginning of the end or maybe the end of the beginning. At any rate, it gets you thinking. Not so much about the dying, but the possible pain involved in the process, besides there is more music coming!<span> </span></p><p>Don’t you understand God!</p><p>That’s funny…</p><p>Yes He understands, always has, always will. My faithful, loving Father who has supplies so many miracles to this undeserving fool.<span> </span></p><p>We’ll see together what the future holds.</p><p><br> </p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73409592024-01-27T04:17:06-05:002024-01-27T04:18:07-05:00In the twinkling of an eye <p>Life changes so much as time passes. Now my life depends on medications, before I never took a pill. Many good friends around the world reaching end of life as I am, all in their own unique situations. Most of us I think, cannot believe how life has changed so dramatically. Now we find ourselves in these places that seem so far removed from where we thought we would be. <span> </span></p><p>We are all trying to stay alive and hopefully planning for an orderly death to bless all involved as we can. Living at such a crazy time as this in the United States. Thank God for faith! We want to affect change, but their isn’t enough gas left in the tank. It’s all up to the younger. I pray the world will be a safe place for them to live and bring up their young but, from my view it doesn’t look loo promising. I guess in a lot of ways I don’t get this generation but some things never change… like TRUTH!</p><p>With God’s help it will all work out ok for me if I simply stay responsible and do the next right thing in front of me. It may seem easy to some to fade away into an alcoholic daze at these end of days. Yet, when you have been blessed by God Grace to remain sober for so long and able to personally witnessed all the wonderful things God has done in my life, how could I possible turn my back on Him now.<span> </span></p><p>The funny thing is, it will all change again, to the point that I will not even recognize the here and now I am present in. Yes indeed, yesterday’s history, tomorrow’s a mystery. Need to stay faithful, follow His way and be grateful, for at this stage of life</p><p>I’m getting closer every moment.</p><p>Soon in the twinkling of an eye<span> </span></p><p>I will be with Him…<span> </span></p><p>THERE!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73403832024-01-26T04:17:31-05:002024-01-26T04:20:35-05:00Fading a bit<p>Made it to Charlotte yesterday…</p><p>Don’t know, but I think my stamina is fading. They have added many express lanes around the city, it makes driving confusing and tedious. I so enjoyed being with everyone at the center, but the travel is getting to be a bit much for me these days. I can still get somewhere if I have a lot of time, but all day hauls are just too much. Just gonna have to back my showboat up.<span> </span></p><p>Being more active in recovery locally is always good. Trouble with serious addiction is everywhere, as close as next door, if you pay attention. So yeah, I think the travel days are coming to a close. Thank you Lord for all the opportunities! I so loved traveling around the country meeting all of those wonderful people! As always…</p><p>Guide us Father from this day forward.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73392042024-01-24T05:42:21-05:002024-01-24T05:42:21-05:00On the Road Again<p>Well.. I’m trying anyway. Can’t do it like I use to but, I’m doing it.<span> </span></p><p>Still dealing with cancer on many fronts. Skin surgeries about ever three months. Continued chemo drugs. In general, trying to maintain a constant level of energy for living. Pill meals before breakfast and dinner. It’s like I have said before, old age ain’t for sissys.<span> </span></p><p>The other day I was hit with a wave of hopelessness that was crazy. I mean it was really dark! Better stay alert for that and be ready to call on the name of the Lord. So grateful for all the Lord has done to keep me alive and well. My work has recently taken on more and more of a spiritual aspect. Maybe that’s why the enemy is jumping my bones. I guess I’m hitting his last nerve. Please keep me in prayer. Rest assured I am praying for my worldwide family of recovery. New music on the way.<span> </span></p><p>Love you all!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73372132024-01-20T05:24:40-05:002024-01-20T05:24:40-05:00Back?<p>Well I’m back.. I guess, still have pain but as I said before, I'll chalk it up to old age and deal with it as best I can. Life goes on, thank goodness. These days with me, it’s not the sure bet I use to think it was. Makes me think more about how I am spending the time I have left.</p><p>It’s Saturday today, very cold and snowy up here in the mountains. Safe and warm in my blessed home. Praise God, I am so grateful! The music is coming well, even following the step of the month pattern, amazing. I guess not a big deal for “ Thee Creator.”</p><p>Inspirations… a dime a dozen.<span> </span></p><p>I love Him so</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/73293032024-01-06T04:42:14-05:002024-01-06T04:42:15-05:00Debt of Gratitude<p>As I get older I seem to remember the past more. Thinking of what could of, should of, but my life is what it is now, stamped down in time. Can’t believe I made it this far. Hopefully a few years left.<span> </span></p><p>Still speaking, still writing, still, hopefully, helping others and have a home life second to none. From my perspective, I guess things could not be better today and today is all I have. This too shall pass. Better enjoy it all while it lasts.<span> </span></p><p>Beaten into submission thirty-seven years ago, thank God. Without all of you and His blessed Grace, where would I be. You are my worldwide family of teachers. I love you all because somehow you loved me when I most needed it.<span> </span></p><p>A debt I can never repay but, I’ll keep trying.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72938052023-10-26T08:36:26-04:002023-10-26T08:59:49-04:00Neighborhoods<p>Yesterday I was located in an older northern city in PA trying to get to a recovery club for a meeting. The downtown area where the club was located was dicey at best. As I walked down the street, I remained aware and concerned for my safety, for that place had a dark spiritual atmosphere.<span> </span></p><p>I have been to many places in cities like that, feeling unsure and unsafe, but once inside the clubs, I felt safe and sound. Lke it was before recovery when I chose to live in a neighborhood of self centered fear. A place full of lies and deception. Now, I live in a new spiritual neighborhood of light and joy and I choose to remain there. I do not want to go back for I have witnessed so many that have tried THAT with disastrous results. As I always tell others, “fear brought me here, but His Love keeps me here.”</p><p>In our fellowship I am safe, understood, accepted and loved back to health every day I choose to connect. It’s amazing, because it never fails. That’s simply because God is faithful.</p><p>Take the steps… Deuteronomy 28</p><p>“If you fully obey the Lord your God and carefully follow all his commands I give you today, the Lord your God will set you high above all the nations on earth.</p><p>…and receive the results… 2 Corinthians 9:8</p><p>“And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you’ll abound in every good work.</p><p>Surrender, Accept, Repent, Forgive, Stand</p><p>“Simple but not Easy.”</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72926022023-10-24T09:41:00-04:002023-10-24T09:41:00-04:00Time<p>The thing about time, is that we just have so much of it.<span> </span></p><p>Having been diagnosed with serious cancers, I had gone through that abrupt revelation of “running out of time.” In addiction, It’s as they say “time flys when your having fun.” Tme, under the influence, vanishes with nothing too show for it, but missed opportunities and warped families. If you’ve made the decision to “go back out,” after you have come into recovery, then you know exactly what I am talking about. At nearly every meeting someone is coming back in after years, sometimes decades of lost time. Many never return. Thank God I was able to learn that early in recovery!<span> </span></p><p>I can’t afford to lose anymore, yet, even in sobriety, my stubborn, slow healing, alcoholic mind has cost me plenty. Yes indeed, we do a number on ourselves while we’re out there, and coming in ,there is so much we must learn but…</p><p>End the end, by God’s Grace, if we can gain recovery and trust in God, we can dodge the bitter end, and come into that life beyond our wildest dreams.<span> </span>Amen</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72917442023-10-22T07:44:26-04:002023-10-22T07:44:27-04:00New Drug?<p>Like my old friend Georgi use to say.. “Changing your drug of choice is like changing seats on the Titanic.. Baby your still goin down,”<span> </span></p><p>Especially Today!</p><p>I have good friend who is a regional mental health professional and has been one for many years. He explained to me the other day that Fentanyl now is very prevalent and found in almost every version of “street” drug. Easy to understand, with our national southern border left wide open by our own government!</p><p>The moral to this story is.. IF you gotta do it, be sure your drugs are coming from a legit source or a formal dispensary, because the cartel’s run the streets in this country and they are pushing that super addictive, lethal “Toe Tag Dope” FYI, They are<span> </span>also expert at counterfeiting pharmaceutical’s and psychotropic’s.</p><p>As you will learn, if you do not already know. Complete abstinence is the only way for us. Anything else will just lead you back, over time, to your drug of choice. As they told me, if you go back out.. “It always gets worse, never better”<span> </span></p><p>Keep in mind… That’s only IF you survive, otherwise it’s just gonna be <a class="no-pjax" href="https://iworldband.org/track/3198846/too-bad"><u>too damned bad</u></a>.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72914772023-10-21T07:56:12-04:002023-10-21T07:56:13-04:00Love<p>Over the years in recovery we speak about so many principles but the one that supersedes them all is love. Like they say, Love conquers all.</p><p>I was in such bad shape when I attended my first meeting, feeling massive shame and guilt. I needed some serious<span> </span>TLC, but in a very specific way. That type of care was exactly what was given to me. I will say this about that, the kindness and understanding from AAs around the world is exceptional!</p><p>I heard a line from a movie the other day where someone was responding to a pledge of protection from another by saying “You don’t even know me” and the response was, “What difference does that make?”<span> </span></p><p>When a stranger comes into AA for the first time, we don’t know them as far as ever having seen them before, but, “WE” do intimately know them in a deeper way.<span> </span></p><p>“WE” of AA have been schooled for years in the universal brokenness of humanity. We have learned, with God’s help and the fellowship, a set of spiritual principles that has enabled us to heal from years of spiritual darkness. At some point, “sometimes quickly sometimes slowly,” we all come into a “knowing” that God’s Love is real. That His Love can be trusted to protect, heal and restore anyone back to their “real” lives. In AA terminology, that would be called “The life beyond your wildest dreams” because that’s exactly what it is.<span> </span></p><p>This is what we offer in AA. A life that would have never been attain without God’s Grace. Offered to us, the broken ones, to accept or reject, in that moment of clarity. This revelation, IF accepted, must be followed by continuing effort. Brought about in recovery, by seeking and working the ancient way of the steps with willingness and perseverance. Through these actions anyone can and will receive the amazing, divine present. Their true life adventure here on earth, and an even better true Love everlasting adventure when we leave.<span> </span></p><p>Don’t believe me?<span> </span></p><p>Just stay.. more will be revealed.<span> </span></p><p>Remember.. it’s a God of your understanding… So from me to you, please stay with us in that clarity and keep on learning, for there is a treasure trove of really good news for you to understand.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72896012023-10-18T14:39:47-04:002023-10-18T14:41:55-04:00IF… I let Him<p>Who would have believed that only by putting down the drink and the drugs it would release such a blessing? I sure didn’t! Sick and tired for nearly twenty years in that upside-down world, I was just headed for the bitter end and didn't even know it.</p><p>After some time in the program I wondered, what would putting down other character defects do for my life?<span> </span></p><p>Well, over the past thirty-seven years, I have placed a number of them behind me or at least diminished their dominance in my life and low and behold what a terrific change that made. It certainly adds new significance and a far stronger desire to change for the better. Simply by letting go, Iwe will receive gigantic divine rewards… just by letting go.</p><p>If you have been with us for a while, you know what I am saying is true so…<span> </span></p><p>What’s holding you back?</p><p><br> </p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72882222023-10-15T21:17:37-04:002023-10-16T11:07:22-04:00Being Seen<p>Sometimes I hear the most profound things from newcomers. A lovely woman tonight with only a few days said…</p><p>“In these rooms, for the first time in many years, I feel like I am being seen for who I really am.”<span> </span></p><p>What a wonder-filled powerful statement for truth! Yes, if you can’t reveal your true self to us, then who can you reveal yourself to. We are the fellowship of the brokenhearted. As I tell others often, we all did half of everything you did, we’re just not sure which half we did, the bad or the worst. We are not saints. Rest assured, no one in recovery is gonna start pointing fingers at anyone besides themselves. We only offer true acceptance for love and tolerance is our code.</p><p>I considered what she said, as was brought back to my early days in recovery…</p><p>Crawling into the rooms, it had been many, many years since I had shown my true colors to anyone. I had been living a secret life. Lying to the point of not even knowing who I was anymore! So being able to put down my long standing charade was an unbelievable relief and so needed in order to heal.</p><p>Finally, I had come to the end of that lie and was made to understand, by God’s Grace, that it was time for me to become real by embracing the truth, or die. Time to give up the masquerade and the useless indoctrinations of the world as I knew them. Time to allow myself to become who I really am, a tiny but critically important part of the Great I am.<span> </span></p><p><i>to be continued.. if you stay so. that more will be revealed!</i></p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72879722023-10-15T04:11:33-04:002023-10-15T04:11:34-04:00Our Spectrum<p>Yesterday I had the privilege of chairing a meeting and was amazed at the diversity of people and their mental and spiritual spectrums. All joined together to listen and to learn from each other how we should “live.” Some there were having great difficulty, while others were what I like to call “super naturals,” yet everyone was on equal footing. That is, every person’s share was just as important to the whole as anyones.<span> </span></p><p>A.A. does not allow just one voice but every voice to teach us. Over time we begin to trust the process. We understand that the individual truth each one of us requires for the day, comes forth from the group by God’s Grace by our combined interest in seeking it. A spiritual solution for our spiritual, present moment dilemma, is what is attained. Amazing!</p><p>Over time as in most classroom settings, if alert and sober, we will learn. Our subjects are not reading writing and arithmetic, they are acceptance, honesty and trust in God. A very exclusive school when it comes to subject matter. Yes, you will harvest a magnanimous yield from the AA school of hard knocks, but only IF you stay.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72872212023-10-13T10:06:30-04:002023-10-15T04:10:53-04:00Resiliency<p>Resiliency</p><p>The capacity to withstand or recover quickly from difficulties.<span> </span></p><p>The ability of an object to spring back into shape.</p><p>A friend gave me this word the other day and asked me how I thought it would worked in recovery. It reminded me of the bit I heard of the wild stallion…</p><p>You could see Him off in the distance. On top of the mountain. Reared up on two legs clawing and snorting at the sky, cool to look at but, what good is he really? Without being broken you can’t catch him, you can’t ride him. You can’t utilize him in any way and he’ll probably get picked off by a pack of wolves in the winter.</p><p>For us in addiction it’s not not much different. With our ego’s crammed in high gear under the influence, we are unable to reason properly. In denial, we continue on until the bitter end unless we BECOME broken and come for help into the rooms of the broken hearted.<span> </span></p><p>Being broken doesn’t mean you can’t get fixed. On the contrary, brokenness is a requirement to achieve the solution. After all, how else can you solve a glaring difficulty if you don’t<span> </span>believe you have one? As I have heard so many times in the rooms… “I didn’t know, I didn’t know.” Not until that moment of clarity did any of us realize how lost we truly were. So lost we didn’t know we’re lost!</p><p>But… Where do we go from here?</p><p>The individual needs to seek help from others who have recovered from that same illness. To spend a small fortune on a shrink that has not actually been though what you have, when the rooms are free and full of people who have, is foolish. Come in and receive our experience, not someones opinion.<span> </span></p><p>What you will learn among many things is the ability to be resilient. You will learn H.O.W. to live and eventually how to give. You will over time become “comfortable in your own skin.” As you go through the one-eighty you become who you really are without that dark spiritual influence. Over time a divine, balanced self love will materialize. THAT, had always been our problem with relationships. Think about it… How could you love another, when we didn’t even love yourself?</p><p>To sum things up best, a new musical friend I met in my morning group put it this way…“Trying to understand all of the true ramifications of recovery, is like trying to play Beethoven’s 9th symphony with a stick and a trash can.”</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72861052023-10-11T06:22:34-04:002023-10-11T06:22:34-04:00Nothing Lost<p>When my son passed away in June of twenty-two, a very good friend told me these two words.. “ Nothings Lost.” Today because of the blessed clarity I enjoy, I can say that I truly believe that.<span> </span></p><p>Thinking that when we die it’s all over, or that we came from the “primordial ooze,” or that we had anything to do with it all is absurd. Our being, created by God in Him image, is the most divinely created gifted life form that I could never imagine and nature is filled with His wonders to behold. All placed in a tiny one of a kind blue eden in the galaxy of the Milky Way with us at the top of the food chain. I mean “ c’mon man!” If you can’t see that your just asleep!<span> </span></p><p>By the by…under the influence, I certainly was for a long time.. “just so’s ya know.. I ain’t calling anybody out.” “More will be revealed eh?”</p><p>Yes indeed, all things are possible with God. This amazing life we have here, is just a wonder-filled proving ground for a much more amazing life in the hereafter. I pray that we can all love better than we’re loving right now for THAT is what is so very important!<span> </span></p><p>Remember if you “get lost” you can always find reference in the bigger book, all you have to do is look.</p><p><i>Ephesians 2:9</i></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><i>For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.</i></p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72362542023-07-03T09:14:23-04:002023-08-31T05:52:57-04:00Prison?<p>The other day, a friend in recovery was speaking about their difficulty in federal prison with periods of solitary confinement. To me, it sounded so much like addiction. It’s as if you are in a solitary state, isolated by your addictive behaviors, living in a secret world, all by yourself. A self made prison from which there is no escape. As if the title they almost gave the Big Book ,“A Way Out.“ Surely capsulizing all of us near the bitter end, searching for a way out.</p><p>I heard my great-grand sponsor quoted a few days ago when someone said, “Church told me who I could be, but AA showed me how to get there.” Yes indeed the Oxford group, Bill and Bob and all the early folks in AA designed the steps. A reverse engineered way to salvation. I think of it as God for dummies. Eighty-eight short years ago without the solution of the steps, or the saving knowledge of the way of Christ many just gave up and gave into the hopelessness of alcoholism and addiction. I watched film today about addiction in the streets of Philly a place that is far worse off since the lasst time I was there. What a horrible tragedy that is happening in so many major cities across our country. Since our leaders, and I use the term loosely, have dropped our borders, drugs now are killing American’s at record rates while the cartels are only getting stronger.</p><p>Love as always is what it boils down to. Finding a true personal relationship with our loving God. It can be just as simple as taking the twelve steps for the addict, alcoholic. Think about this, if you don’t have that personal relationship with God by now, then maybe it’s time you lay down what you think you knew about God, and start anew. The twelve steps have worked for millions of addicts and they will work for you, IF you let them but, you must give yourself honestly to the work to receive the desired result. As my good friend Earl used to say, “If you want a strawberry cake, you need to follow the directions in order to have one.” It’s the same way here. Remember it’s a process, and it will take some time, so please be patient with yourself. I will assure you in advance, the results are worth infinitely more than any effort you expend to get there. If you need to garner faith in the process to continue, simply attend recovery groups. There you will see for the yourself the results you are seeking in the lives of others. Proof positive it works!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72235342023-06-08T20:19:24-04:002023-06-08T20:19:24-04:00let God do it<p>So much blessed peace around us all the time, if we just take the time to enjoy it. To slow down and even notice it, takes work somedays. So much of my life in addiction was a blur. These days life is much slower. Just can’t really take on the fast pace anymore.</p><p>It can all change in an instant. What was for so many years, can fly away never to return, if we let it. Pray we don’t have war in this country. With all these crazy’s in positions of power in our government and their media deception, few really know what’s going on. I know this.. it ain’t good! My advice… stay informed. Check out Tucker Carlson, by God’s grace he’s still alive and seems to be talking truth on Twitter these days. You decide what you think and check out our “What’s Wrong Songs” too.</p><p>So grateful for all the Lord has done, so many miracles I have enjoyed in recovery. Like they say, its all about the alignment of the will. Get your will alined with the Light of Christ and all things go just the way there are suppose to… for your betterment. Don’t know the way, just take the steps. You may not understand it all as it’s going down but, just “fear not,” and more<span> </span>blessed understanding will be revealed.<span> </span></p><p>Still up with my dog tonight, she just can’t sleep anymore. The wife and I have not been feeling well and I have had a lot of serious medical to deal with so we have been sleeping quite a bit. Our pooch however is still a pup, wants to run. Yes, life has been a string of miracles that I do not deserve but that’s the way it works for all of God’s children in recovery who repent and<span> </span>seek. When we turn it all back over to Him and surrender, things work out the way there are suppose to. Worked for me and it know it will work for you for.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72203022023-06-04T08:00:01-04:002023-06-04T08:00:01-04:00Blessed<p>Well I thought I was doing fine but I still have some problems that need to be addressed. Seems the Lukemia has started up again and is giving me trouble. For that reason, more blood work today. I am beginning to see how people could get really tired of all this, but I must remember how blessed I am to have access to this level of care.<span> </span></p><p>I think of those in war zones around the world. Wished our government had a bit of self control<span> </span>and restraint but, I think most know we have already crossed over the line in so many ways. I believe when they created the C.I.A. that is when lying became a fine art. Since that time up until now we have been pushing further and further away from God and it is only our God, who has blessed our country for these many years. I feel, as many others do, that reprisals are coming.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72188062023-06-01T05:04:12-04:002023-06-01T05:04:12-04:00Praise the Lord!<p>Well… went through the PET scan no problem and saw the doc. The report I got on that particular cancer was outstanding. All looks fine, no more of that active cancer visible. Come back in three months for checkup. Wow, thank you Jesus and thank you doctors and staff, what a gift. The ordeal paid off!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72182202023-05-31T06:02:33-04:002023-05-31T06:05:21-04:00Today's a big day! <p>In a few hours I am going in for a P.E.T. scan to see if the cancer I had undergone treatment for has been cleared. I pray the Lord will help this scan to show cancer free. Won’t have the answer until tomorrow when I see the doc. I still have blood cancer to deal with, for those are so far incurable, but thus far that is being managed.<span> </span></p><p>Old age is something to deal with all right. I guess we just never figure were gonna wear out. I have a very good friend Kenny right down the street who, I am sure, in his younger days was a very formidable military man. He and I have been sitting on his front porch reminiscing over the years, hoping we still have a few more to enjoy each others company. We have both had our medical issues, but slowly, surely the Lord is helping us find our way through. Neither of us are too afraid of dying for we both love the Lord. Its just we enjoy life so much these days.</p><p>On the music front lots of new work is coming. New titles include America, Change and …but God. Sorry it’s taking so long. Like I was saying, these days, I’m about half fast. Love you all please say a prayer for me today. Know I am praying for all of you.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72182182023-05-31T05:24:38-04:002023-05-31T05:24:38-04:00With Time<p>Thirty-seven years ago, I was a shivering denizen of the mad realm of alcoholism. Today, as I sit here on my back porch enjoying the fire, the birds, and my wonderful wife, I tried to remember what it was like. I just can’t get the same feeling to come back. However, I’ll never forget all the trouble it brought me. Yes, God has allowed the distant past to fade for me, and living in the now is who I am.<span> </span></p><p>I remember coming into recovery in my early thirties thinking I’m too old for this! THANK GOD I stayed. Like they say, “We’re sicker than we think we are”…amen to that! It’s been a long road coming back with many serious roadblocks over the years. Staying the course is so important because it’s the long term sobriety that we want for you. It’s all about getting closer to that plaque about serenity on Dr. Bob’s desk. Believe it or not, it will happen if you do the work and stay to give it away.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72134092023-05-22T11:47:23-04:002023-05-22T11:48:08-04:00Isolation or solitude<p>I was so isolated in my addiction I wrote a song about it called “Isolation Man.” It was without a doubt a house favorite when I performed at rehab centers. Popular because everyone could relate. It’s exactly what addiction does. Gets you all alone and then tries to take you out. Oh I remember the early party days when the crowd would get together each night but. usually by the end of the night we find ourselves drinking all alone until we just can’t do it anymore. Thank God I don’t live like THAT anymore!</p><p>Like my good friend Craig always says “ I drank because I hated myself and I hated myself because I drank” The endless circus death defying loop world that we find ourselves in.</p><p>Today after many year in the program my life has dramatically changed. After surrendering my life to God and working all the steps in order with a sponsor I have been set free.. PRAISE GOD! No more isolation now replaced by blessed solitude. A choice I make on a daily basis to be alone with my God and to allow the holy spirit to speak to me to fulfill my true purpose.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72115502023-05-18T16:58:56-04:002023-05-18T16:58:56-04:00SAVED?<p>New in recovery?</p><p>Many want it all back right away, or talk about the blessings of recovery coming too slowly. I have news for you. You do not understand how fortunate you are my friend.<span> </span></p><p>I want you to think about this!<span> </span></p><p>When you came all the way into recovery and sat all the way down and surrendered you were in bad shape to say the least. If the truth were known, you were probably very close to death. That the gift of that moment of clarity was presented to you by the Grace of God, is and was at that time a LIFE SAVING gift. Had you not fully received it at that particular moment something very bad would have most likely happened to you in the very near future.<span> </span></p><p>Stop right here for just a moment and think of how you were then.<span> </span></p><p>How was your physical and mental condition.<span> </span></p><p>What type and quantity of drugs or drink were you determined to do each day.<span> </span></p><p>The people and places you would frequent.</p><p>How was “life,” or was it more of a walking death? Yeah.. that’s what I’m talking about!<span> </span></p><p>If your honest you know what I’m saying and if you go to meetings, you know it can happen again no matter how much time you have. So the moral of this story is stay grateful, and get on your knees each day and thank God for that blessed gift of unmerited Grace that has made your life so wonder-full.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72082042023-05-13T05:10:54-04:002023-05-13T05:11:34-04:00Love<p>It’s what we were all looking for in the first place we just didn’t know it. True love that is, the kind that comes from God. I guess as far as love in early recovery is concerned, the first pitfall we need to watch for is another wrong romance.<span> </span></p><p>We all come in so needy and co-dependent the last thing we need is to hook up with someone sicker than we are! Passion can throw us no matter how strong we think we are, so let’s keep the main thing the main thing, staying clean and sober and finding our way.I was telling a friend yesterday in the rooms who is waiting for a medical solution, that the reason we know that we are finally submitting to a loving God, is that recovery works! You can expect a loving miracle, if you stay and do the work. What I will tell you is that it just may not look quite the way you thought it would, because God will give you your NEEDED version not your wanted one.</p><p>So how do we know if true love is manifesting through<span> </span>our recovery. Simple, as you honestly work the steps you will start to receive the fruits of the spirit outlined in the Bible. They are; love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. When I read through these I also understood that I had none of these gifts at the end of my addiction. As a matter of fact I was far more exhibiting the works of the flesh which are sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies. It only made sense. These dark traits manifest simple because without thinking, we had voluntarily submitted to the lower power over our years of addiction. The longer we stay there, the worse it gets… AMEN BROTHER! Purposely turning away from the darkness coming back over that invisible line and humbly resubmitting ourselves to a loving God by taking those first three steps is what we need to do.<span> </span></p><p>If we continue steps four through nine we will gain the clarity and forgiveness we so desperately need. This clears the way for God loving flow to return. The promises of AA will also begin to materialize after the ninth for they are also in alinement with God’s blessed will for us much like the fruit of the spirit.</p><p>It sure seems like a miracle and I suppose it is but, there is a methodology. A spiritual malady requires spiritual solution. Repent which means change direction and gain that forgiveness you need by forgiving others. Not really that hard to accomplish, it just requires honesty, willingness and an open mind.<span> </span></p><p> </p><p>Its all yours, if you WANT it.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/72034802023-05-05T10:55:47-04:002023-05-05T11:00:15-04:00Future Fears?<p>You can put your mind to rest if your willing to stay with us. Spirit leads always and forever. <a class="no-pjax" href="/track/1177122/spirit-will-guide-you-spirit-always-guides-us" target="_blank" data-link-type="track" data-link-label="Spirit Will Guide You / Spirit always guides us">The spirit you submit to, will always guide you.<span> </span></a></p><p>When we were in that dark spiritual neighborhood of addiction we experienced bad consequences. We had to have them for we were following the dark spirit. When we came into the new neighborhood of light, love and truth and stayed continuing to do the work required, the bad consequences went away. We began to realize a wonderful new life that was not available to us until we made the decision to repent ( turn around …spiritually ).</p><p>Remember in active addiction, when we would end up in places and wonder to ourselves how did I get myself into this one! We got ourselves there simply because we were following that dark lying spirit, that’s the way we get EVERYWHERE we get, by following a spirit.<span> </span></p><p>In recovery when we “suddenly realize” that God is doing for us. That is but another revelation that we are now being lead into a new spiritual place because we are no longer following the dark spirit. We have submitted and surrender again to the true spirit of light and love as we did before when we surrendered to that dark spirit of bondage, lies and hate. In recovery we often hear “I’m not getting what I deserve,” but in reality we are always deserving because we can only receive from the spirit following that we select.</p><p>How quickly we recover and receive new spiritual “earnings” depends on many things, but here are a few of the big ones.</p><ol style="list-style-type:decimal;">
<li>How long were you under that dark spirit?</li>
<li start="2">How much damage did you allow to family, friends and finances before you changed your stripes.</li>
<li start="3">Will you really stay the course or will you keep falling back.</li>
</ol><p>“Sometimes quickly sometimes slowly” it all really depends on your past and your ability now to stay the course no matter what. Here’s the good news. Blessed faith is now on your side. That is, good things WILL happen now because you are doing what your doing, following truth. The consequences for both paths are as sure as the nose on your face. You WILL receive from the spiritual path YOU CHOOSE. It will come because it must. That’s the way it works.</p><p>One last thing to remember…</p><p>When you change your path to light and love you will begin to receive what you need. Need, because you NEED divine fulfillment and <a class="no-pjax" href="/track/348619/love-loves-you" target="_blank" data-link-type="track" data-link-label="LOVE LOVES YOU">Love loves you.</a> You may not recognize this at first, but you will over time if you stay in that true neighborhood. With time you will understand that what you needed, is really what you always wanted, you just didn’t know it. You did not know it because the time you spent in the other neighborhood was living in a lie.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71984642023-04-28T04:56:05-04:002023-04-28T04:56:05-04:00Spiritual Malady?<p>We suffer from a spiritual malady. Lets face it, we all spent too much time in that dark neighborhood. Like they say, it’s all about the alinement of the will. God gave us free will spiritual choice, we just kept making the wrong one, over and over again. What can you expect under the influence! With time, staying in that dark place, there are consequences but we all already know about those.<span> </span></p><p>Love must be a choice, otherwise it would not be love. Doing the 180 turns us around. The word here is “ repent,” to turn in the opposite direction. When we “ repent “ and choose to dwell in the neighborhood of light by doing the next right thing, we usually<span> </span>can exist there without negative consequence, unless God is trying to show us something we need.<span> </span></p><p>Over time in the light, we move into real God purposed life. It’s the way that our loving God had for us all along, we just needed to be willing to choose rightly. It reminds me of the “Wizard of Oz,”<span> </span>Dorothy had the ruby slippers on the whole dang movie, she just didn’t know how to use them. It’s that way with all of us. When we fogged our minds with alcohol or drugs we become lost to ourselves.</p><p>It takes time for us to get back from that place depending on the amount of time you spent there. As Georgie use to tell me “ be patient before you become one.” We need to persevere in our new found sobriety to gain that real life that God so wants for us. This can be accomplished by meeting attendance, working through the steps with our sponsors, and lots and lots of prayer.<span> </span></p><p>What new people forget is that to lose it all, and go back to complete ruin, takes just a simple change of mind and only one drink. Remember all your hard work and life as you knew it, can all disappear in just a few moments if you’re in a black out. Don’t release the dark phenomenon of craving on to yourself again by taking that first one.</p><p>Remember</p><p>Constant vigilance, is the way to consistent sobriety. Keep your head up!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71958042023-04-24T07:02:00-04:002023-04-24T07:02:01-04:00Living it down<p>Alcoholism takes a while to mature in our lives, even if you felt like you were alcoholic from the start as I did. Whether you’re in that place five years or fifty, with all that drinking comes a lot of lying, cheating and stealing. No siree, that ain’t-a-gonna-go away overnight just because you put the drink down. You’re gonna have to live it down.<span> </span></p><p>How long will that take you ask?<span> </span></p><p>Well, I guess that depends on the amount of damage you did while under the influence. I can tell you this, working the twelve steps can surely get things going in the right direction. Like my good buddy Wally used to say, “you got to EARN respect”, and sometimes that takes a while when you’ve been drunk for years. As they say, saddle up the turtle because early recovery can be kinda slow going<span> </span>compared to that fast paced, crazy, chaotic life we were living.</p><p>Alcoholism, “cunning, baffling and powerful”. I was sure, when I stopped, I’d never make it, only by God’s Grace and the H.O.W. of recovery, could it even happen.<span> </span></p><p>Yes, to gain that respect will take time, but one thing’s for sure, when you put the plug in the jug, you better make sure it stays there. As Christ himself told us, to uncork the party once again will create a situation seven times as bad. I know when I think about my last time around, I can’t even imagine seven times as bad. Could I even survive that?</p><p>Incomprehensible demoralization X 7</p><p>No thanks…I believe I’ll stay and do that living amends thing. Much better to live it down than die trying by going back out again and again.</p><p>One day at a time.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71932182023-04-19T14:56:46-04:002023-04-19T14:56:46-04:00What can you expect?<p>Well as early sponsors use to say expectations are pre meditated resentments. However, after nearly forty years of sobriety I can say that there is much you can expect IF, you stay with the program and allow the steps to become a way of life.<span> </span></p><p>Lets start at the beginning.<span> </span></p><p>The first big thing was the desire to drink went away. Just as the book said, it was as if it were removed, taken away. After nearly<span> </span>twenty years of alcohol addiction that was a flipping miracle.<span> </span></p><p>I wondered…If God can do that, what else could He do?</p><p>Then with sober time and working the steps I started to find out…</p><p>Others told me I was looking better and I started feeling better. I found I could belly laugh again, usually at myself. I started to have money in my pocket, where as before there was none. I stopped having car accidents. I started sleeping, even dreaming at night. General living problems started to go away as I became more responsible. I was told I was beginning to love myself in a new balanced way and as a result I was able to really love others and be loved by them. I excelled in education. So many people came back into my life. I was no longer alone and isolated. I started to develop a new sense of purpose. I was getting recognized for my abilities instead of my liabilities. Depression left and the new happiness came. Faith replaced fear.</p><p>I found a true real relationship with God.</p><p>So as not as to go on and on which I could, let me say this in closing. I realized speaking with a good friend over coffee just yesterday morning that it was really always about that plaque on Dr. Bob desk. The plaque defining humility. That was the real prize and had always been in plain sight, I just dismissed because it seemed so unattainable.</p><p>Here’s what it says…</p><p>"Perpetual quietness of heart. It is to have no trouble. It is never to be fretted or vexed, irritable or sore; to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing done against me.</p><p>"It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised, it is to have a blessed home in myself where I can go in and shut the door and pray to my Father in secret and be at peace, as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and about is seeming trouble."</p><p>If you have been around a while and you read that, you just may realize that you too, by God’s grace through the fellowship, have attained that wonderful level of new understanding. As they say though, humility is not thinking less of yourself, it thinking of yourself less. So don’t think too much about it all, cause you just may lose what you work so hard to attain.</p><p> </p><p><br> </p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71908892023-04-15T09:00:43-04:002023-04-15T09:05:46-04:00The Invisible Line<p>Years ago I was in Nashville fortunate to be working with an Grammy award winning producer on “<a class="no-pjax" href="/track/415091/invisible-line-2001-spiritual-darkness" target="_blank" data-link-type="track" data-link-label="Invisible Line / 2001 Spiritual Darkness"> The Invisible Line</a>.” I have had some time in recovery since that release to reflect on it.<span> </span>Today I believe that when we are so caught up in self, so as to cross that invisible line and march into that dark dangerous neighborhood, we are completely on our own, where only two options are possible.<span> </span></p><ol style="list-style-type:decimal;">
<li>We continue to drink and drug until we become constitutionally incapable and then unwittingly give ourselves over to the dark side. Or…</li>
<li start="2">On our way deeper into that black hole, we may gain understand that “Pain is the touchstone of spiritual growth.” That is, as we take ourselves to a point of incomprehensible demoralization where we may have a moment of true realization. At that point we may repent and perhaps survive if we do not return.</li>
</ol><p>F.Y.I .Scripture says to return back into that darkness is seven times as bad. I have witnessed that many times in the lives of others and can say without a doubt that that IS, the way it is. Strange as it may seem, God must permit that place to be. For unless someone is able to choose of their own free will, what is right, just and pure then love cannot be. As we all know, you can’t make people love, they must allow it.</p><p>Most people in recovery have come from the opposite place. While many are looking for the gates of heaven to open up and let them in, for us, before recovery, we desperately needed the gates of hell to open up to let us out!<span> </span>To come into any new place you must leave the old one behind. Sounds simple, but sometimes not so easy when you have spent so much time there. As weird as it sounds, many are afraid to move back across that invisible line into God’s neighborhood of light and love because it seems so foreign and undeserved.<span> </span></p><p>My friends that is the darkness telling you another lie.<span> </span></p><p>Know this…</p><p>Nothing can ever be further from the truth than simply another lie from Satan.</p><p>The truth…</p><p>God loves us, is for us and if you are willing to forgive, he will render you white as snow.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71894482023-04-13T11:32:10-04:002023-04-13T11:32:11-04:00Mental Illness?<p>According to the first one hundred, we are to be considered “outright mental defectives in full flight from reality.” Does that sound like mental illness to you, it sure does to me!</p><p>So often in the rooms I hear people say they have mental problems and I am sure many do. Through the twelve steps I see so much of that clear up. If you are willing to stay honest, do the work required and receive the forgiveness you need, you WILL get better! Then after that, improvement is just a matter of allowing God more access on a daily basis to your heart and mind by seeking through prayer or meditation. As they say more will be revealed and as additional truth is realized, more freedom materializes until you become more “comfortable in your own skin.”</p><p>Think about it. If you drank like I did, just about every day, then you are impairing your ability to think rightly… about every day. Over time, this, as well as anything else you do repeatedly wrong, creates consequences.<span> </span></p><p>Consider this…</p><p>What is mental illness, but an illness you don’t realize you have. In the extreme, this would be a bit like a brown out or black out eh? As I often tell others, the last thing you are likely to lose in active addiction is yourself. How many times have I heard people in active addiction say “I don’t even know who I am anymore”. Talk about mental illness! This dis-ease is cunning baffling and powerful, lions, tigers and bears OH MY! So, this mental illness thing is a pretty sticky wicket when it comes to alcoholism or addiction.<span> </span></p><p>Rather than going on an on about the problem however, lets talk solution.<span> </span></p><p>Let me state here that I am not a doctor, and know nothing about medications. What I want to tell you is that if you are doing what active addicts, alcoholics do to themselves, then you are indeed suffering from an acute form of mental illness. If you stop imbibing, come with us, do the work and stay, you WILL get better. The simple action requested here, is to take time every so often in your recovery, to reassess your mental condition. On close introspective reflection you just may find that it has vanished, exactly like your desire to drink.</p><p>Thank You Jesus!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71875062023-04-11T03:34:55-04:002023-04-13T10:01:45-04:00LIFE<p>No matter what, it just keeps going. It only stops when it does. Controlled chaos or as best I think I can control it. Can’t believe I use to drink so much that I would actually allowed it to get so out of control. I remember thinking in those lost days how fun it all seemed. In reality, that lifestyle was so dangerous to me and everyone around me.<span> </span></p><p>Speaking with a friend the other day I discover he had children close to death by addiction. I felt for him, because I know how powerless that can become. We try to do what we can to help our kids and then we see that behavior surface. I was there, I get it, as the parent and the child. I suppose that’s why recovery is so important to me. In the rooms I can talk with so many others who have endured that crazy life. Though their experience strength and hope I can somehow make sense of it all and come to the realization of just how precious this miracle of life really is.</p><p>At this time, because of God Grace and recovery, I have enjoyed many years of sane, rational lifestyle where solid progress has been attainable. I look around my life today and I am so grateful for all God and the fellowship has done for me. Having been diagnosed with cancer a few years back now I struggle with that.<span> </span></p><p>How life changes. Now, I want to maintain a sober lifestyle and must in order to be able to live. Doctors, heath centers, expensive medications, insurance and travel all done is varied physical conditions would be impossible without sobriety. Simple mistakes at this level have dire consequences. I must stay alert and focused to insure the right decisions are made in that regard. Yet even with all that going on, I can say without a doubt I truly love my life today. A long and winding road to be sure but, one now filled with the blessed awareness of joy supplied by our amazing loving God and all of you.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71783982023-03-25T11:48:50-04:002023-04-08T09:58:38-04:00God's Timeline<p>Today I’m in a very peaceful place. A snug little screened in porch, with a nice fire going on a rainy morning. I am here trying to understand how and why the love of God has affected my life in so many wonderful ways.<span> </span></p><p>As I look back over my past thirty-seven years of sobriety trying to do the next right thing, I see how very kind our God is. In just a few days I’ll be getting a response from my cancer team. They will be telling me what condition my condition is in after the seven week regimen and a few weeks of recovery. I feel well and I pray God has done yet another undeserved miracle in my life.<span> </span></p><p>It’s nothing short of amazing how He has brought me to this place where my life has turned around. It’s funny, because it feels like it just happened without my doing anything. In reality, what it has been, is millions of tiny decisions, in all those present moments over all the years of trying to do the next right thing. That cumulative effect, in anyone at all, creates a God directed life which always take us closer to our divine earthly purpose or, if you like, heaven on earth. With continued willingness, even more revelation can come about hopefully bringing acceptance of Christ to gain our critical everlasting destiny and heavenly home.<span> </span></p><p>It still seems so incredible for me, for I was the one who was running away from God as far as I possibly could. Then, at that blessed moment, true clarity arrived. Thank you Jesus for your amazing, ginormous, immutable Love for us!<span> </span></p><p>You are the blessed God we serve!</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71762442023-03-22T01:15:29-04:002023-04-08T09:54:29-04:00Finding Joy<p>Finding Joy, like all good things, takes time and work. I think it just naturally, or rather, super naturally comes after we understand, know and trust love. So you say, how can you develop a trusting divine love? Well first you must understand that all trust must be first earned to be received. You must begin to allow God’s Love to earn your trust.<span> </span></p><p>Jesus is faithful!</p><p>You will need to see with spiritual vision to understand rightly. Spiritual vision can only be found with a sober lifestyle. As you gain sobriety and clarity, your intuition seems to just “turn on”. You become able to feel and witness spiritual life. Over the years, if you continue to “seek” you will “find” and begin to gain a real historic timeline with God where you can comprehend. This could never happen in your life before, because you were under the influence. Now, you can witness over sober time. what doing the next right thing can do in your life.<span> </span></p><p>Yes, without sobriety, it would be impossible, yet sobriety is not the only key. We must ALLOW this thing to happen. We ALONE control the power of spiritual choice in our lives. To achieve joy will require a radical new form of honest self discipline. Like they say, “there’s only one thing we have to change…EVERYTHING.”<span> </span></p><p>This is nearly impossible to do alone. You will need help, instruction and correction from others who know the way. Thankfully, the only way to keep this gift of divine joy is to give it away. So, the help of the fellowship is always close by and available IF your willing to receive it. The fellowship is one of the few places where you can experience the “want what they have” thing. With our level of stubbornness, seeing it seems, is the only way we can become believing.<span> </span></p><p>As we all know, we don’t really deserve anything good because of our past behaviors yet, if we adhere to the program and continue to seek God by doing the rest of the steps, we can gain the honesty, humility and forgiveness that we need.<span> </span></p><p>“More will be revealed” for In our lives the results will manifest to prove to us that we are receiving the results. Then at some later moment down the lin, we suddenly experience an overwhelming realization that “God is indeed doing for us what we cannot do for ourselves.” It’s truly an amazing process and something you just don’t want to miss so as “WE” say.. Keep coming back!</p><p><br> </p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71740272023-03-18T04:17:15-04:002023-04-08T09:58:38-04:00Welcome Home<p>Change is a really hard thing for us. Stubborn and defiant, that’s who we are<span> </span>when we come in. Besides, we have all the answers, right? The only problem is that everything is wrong.<span> </span></p><p>I have an elderly friend now who I spoke with the other evening. He is going through the grieving process for he lost his wife and he’s drinking himself to death. He’s the kind of man who needs a wife, so I know its hard on him especially at his age. He is isolated and now lives alone. He’s a bit of a depressive and although He is trying to do what he thinks he needs to be doing, I sense a reluctance to the fellowships of recovery.<span> </span></p><p>I can say from experience, it’s very difficult to make it out there alone. It’s a WE program for many reasons, but the one that comes to mind ( no pun intended ) is a sick mind cannot heal itself.</p><p>I remember those early days wondering what I was doing. I remember thinking what will people think about me now? Who am I going to hang out with? Am I really an alcoholic? I don’t have anything in common with these people. Yeah that was me alright, in full flight from reality! In truth, I desperately needed those pople, but I didn’t know. It. Just like, so many other things I didn’t know. Early sponsors use to tell me “I didn’t know, I didn’t know I didn’t know” Yeah baby, straight up, a real nowhere man.</p><p>Change was what I needed, but I was afraid, just like my friend. They told me when I came in “Don’t worry,, there’s only one thing you need to change… EVERYTHING!” Yikes, these people are wacked. What’s a person to do?<span> </span></p><p>My advice, read the book, stay and follow directions, it ain’t rocket science. I know, I know, this won’t work for you. Why if I didn’t know better I would say your an alcoholic… BAM!<span> </span></p><p>This all seems funny now because recovery has changed my life in so many great new ways. Now, through recovery, I have been transformed into a much better version of who I really am. No longer afraid now I’m comfortable in my own skin and I gotta tell ya, it feels wonderful!</p><p>Back to our dilemma, what’s a person to do?<span> </span></p><p>Well… it’s as they say, you can go on to the bitter end and die a horrible alcoholic death or change and come with us. We will help you to understand yourself because we are all suffering from the same thing you have, untreated alcoholism. Besides, we all now know, we can’t keep what we have, unless we give it away so guess what?</p><p>We really need you here with us!</p><p>Welcome home!</p><p> </p><p><br> </p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71731312023-03-16T22:56:37-04:002023-03-16T22:56:37-04:00Finding Your True Self<p>I often tell people the last thing you will lose in addiction is yourself. It just happens probably as a result of all the lying and brain fog. Finding yourself after all your abuse takes time as with everything in recovery. I mean the name itself, after all, what is it we are recovering.<span> </span>It cannot be rushed, you must allow yourself to clear up and establish new healthy patterns in your life. Ninety meetings in ninety days was set up for it takes ninety times to develop a new habit.<span> </span>Once we come onto the path and get on the beam. We can start to make some headway.<span> </span></p><p>If you can remember your life prior to picking up your first drug or drink I think that is a good place to start. Do a review of what it was like then. What were you like? What did you enjoy doing? What type of friends did you have? I think this can get you started in finding out who you really are. Addiction always wants to paint it all black. It tells you.. “what’s the<span> </span>use you can’t do anything anyway, why try, isolate and stay trapped in a tiny life, because your not going anywhere anyway.” What a lie! We all hear that voice, but that is from the dark side and has nothing to do with your reality today.<span> </span></p><p>Although you may be broke and feel like you no place to turn, that is not true either. After you complete the steps and have made your amends many people will receive you once again perhaps a bit cautiously, but they will. For no one hated you, they only hated the way you were under the influence of alcohol and drugs. Now that you are freed from that bondage people will start responding to you in new and positive ways. Ways that would have never been possible under the influence.</p><p>Don’t be afraid to try new things. You may just find out that you are good at them. Be sure and try the things you enjoyed before addiction for they are still within you and can always be nurtured with at little practice or additional education. Above all have some fun. Now that you don’t spend every dime you have on your habit, go out!Go to the movies, bowling, skydiving, dancing whatever flips your switch as long as it has nothing to do with the old ways. You are wondrous creation of Almighty God. Let yourself become that once again for He would have it no other way.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71725442023-03-16T04:27:28-04:002023-03-16T04:27:28-04:00Relationships<p>The other day in group, a good friend pointed out that his sponsor had told him “no new relationships for a year.’ That is very good advice. When you hear the slogan, “we will love you until you can love yourself, ” their not kidding.<span> </span></p><p>Coming in the door to recovery most of us are in pretty bad shape. It’s a wonder that I had not done myself in. So many die before they ever get find our door. Speaking at rehabs, I use to ask "how many peoples had experienced an OD flatline before” and always about half the room raised their hands. Learning to truly love oneself takes time, and like my old friend Georgie use to say, “Be patient before you become one!”</p><p>Yeah!</p><p>My second sponsor Mr. Wally K. use to say that romantic relationships will throw you every time. He use to speak about passion. I get that. The heat of a new relationship may be even more powerful than a drink or a drug, but for sure it can throw you. Getting your recovery established is the main thing here. There will be plenty of time for relationship, but only after you learn to love yourself. After all you can’t give away what you haven’t got, right?<span> </span></p><p>It’s not everything all the time like it was before you got here. Now, some things you need to leave alone, until you learn what you need to know. It sounds extreme, even brutal, for if we ever needed someone, now is the time, but we speak from experience. Experience that you need to listen to if your going to make it in recovery.<span> </span></p><p>On the other hand, I would strongly advise against divorce early in recovery, for you have just started to address the main problem that you have. When that is corrected, and it will be, if you follow directions from a good sponsor who has a sponsor. Your relationship that you thought had fallen apart, can, with a little work return better than ever before!<span> </span></p><p>Divorce only takes a few strokes of a pen. Early sponsors told me no major decisions for a year, and divorce is certainly a major decision. So, before you warp the greatest gifts God has given you, namely, your children, a willing wife and yourself, you need to hold up. Separate for a bit if need be, but over sober time, you will clear up and be able to see things in a better light. In truth, it was the addiction that was your biggest problem all along, and now that that’s been resolved, things can and will get much better. That old expression is so perfect here.. “Don’t throw your babies out with your dirty bathwater!” Trust me when I tell you all things are possible with God and now that you have turned your life over to Him, you need to allow Him to do the amazing work that you cannot.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71717862023-03-15T04:30:01-04:002023-03-15T10:23:24-04:00meetings?<p>I was just thinking the other day about meetings. Pretty amazing the way they work. A buch of misfits show up at a location and sit down together. We all listen to “how it works, the steps and traditions" to remind ourselves we don’t have all the answers, but there is a power who does. We pray, select a topic and all honestly and openly share on that topic. What seems to happen is that God shows up, and starts speaking to me through the others in the room. When it’s over, it seems like everyone there, including myself, has received their marching orders for the day. We get what we need in this way for the maintenance of our daily spiritual condition.<span> </span></p><p>Who would believe it or even experience it unless they had to. Funny, the reason we attend is because our lives depend on coming. We have no one to blame for that condition other than ourselves. God has a wonderful sense of humor. We have essentially forced ourselves into coming. Yet, after some time of “mandatory” attendance it’s as they say, we start to want to come to meetings.</p><p>Do they work? </p><p>Well, all I can tell you is that I have been to about ten thousand or so and my life’s great, far better than it was without the meetings. I truly believe far better off than it could have ever gotten without the meetings. Lets not forget that though the meetings, and the people there, we are introduced to the process of recovery.<span> </span>I have gone through that twelve step process. As an amazing benefit I have met about a million true blue friends that I never ever would have met. Friends like I had never had before. Real friends, that really care. Yes, it’s all pretty dang amazing when I think about it. God opened a door through MY pain and suffering, that I was forced to go through that has delivered me to a wonderful new life. Today, truly a place beyond my wildest dreams.</p><p>Sure different see that one coming,</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71709392023-03-14T00:04:35-04:002023-03-14T00:08:45-04:00Don't sell short<p>Something that I didn’t understand as a newbee in recovery was the depth of the Gods Grace that would be revealed in the program. I finally did realize however, that life in addiction is a dead end and a rote life at its very best. No real change ever, just a new version of daily chaos to deal with.</p><p>Early on, my mind could not really grasp another way of life, because I had been trapped in such a bad one for so long. Many times as I made my way through early sobriety as a indifferent agnostic I would I asked myself, “Is this all there is?“<span> </span></p><p>A self directed life is just that, self directed, but a God directed life is a way that is filled with endless possibilities and a very probable ending beyond your wildest dreams. The only way that can even happen is if we are willing to let go and let God direct our lives. To do that we will need real faith and the best way to find that faith is by attending meetings within the fellowships. There you will see for yourself the realities of doing the next right thing. You will witness amazing outcomes, unexpected twists and turns that seem to bring every thing together, Solutions materialize when none are there and people wake up to real knowledge and a true love for God in their lives…wild but true!<span> </span></p><p>I will tell you this…</p><p>If you have the willingness to go and see for yourself what God does in their lives, pretty soon you will be wondering what He can do in yours.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71702102023-03-13T07:14:10-04:002023-03-13T07:14:10-04:00Undeniable<p>A.A. got it’s early start through the Oxford group founded on Christian biblical principles which were broken down into twelve simple steps. Always thought of it as sort of God for dummies.<span> </span></p><p>I was certainly a dummy when I got here, drinking myself stupid every night. So I needed a simple clear cut step by step outline to follow and that’s what A.A. gave me. I can’t, He can, I think I’ll let Him, Get honest and confess my sins, Ask God to help remove my other defects of character. Ask for forgiveness for my trespasses against others and then stay close to God through prayer, meditation and carrying my cross.<span> </span></p><p>Like they say, “more will be revealed.” No one can bring the revelation of Christ into your life but Jesus himself and He will when He sees anyone who is finally willing to follow His way instead of their own. Love God, steps one through three. Love your neighbor steps four through nine and love yourself steps ten through twelve,<span> </span></p><p>As it says in step twelve, as a result of working all the steps our lives have been transformed. That was all well and good, but I wanted more. I wanted the assurance of eternal life with God in heaven, so I just gave my life over to Christ and was baptized. Such a simple thing to do and so very important. Why I did not do it sooner I believe, was simply the difficulty of coming out from under that fog that I was in for so long when I crawled in. It takes time for that to clear and then to see and understand Christ working in your life. Eventually it became undeniable. I mean, I didn’t deserve what was happening in my life and I never paid for what I had received, but eventually, hopefully, we come to believe and receive the understanding that someone did. Someone paid a very dear price for each and every one of us. It’s simply human history.<span> </span></p><p>As it points out in the twelfth step “ We find ourselves in possession of a degree of honesty, tolerance, unselfishness, peace of mind and love which we had thought ourselves quite incapable of…. Hummm sure sounds like Jesus to me. Yes a free gift IF we open our hearts and start following the way, but as Christ himself said “No one gets to Father except by me.” So although things had been going well within the program I did not want to miss out on the grand prize, who would? Please take the time to pray about these things and do the investigative work for yourself, for your very eternity is at stake. It’s simply your decision, but what a critical decision it is.<span> </span></p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71697762023-03-12T06:25:37-04:002023-03-12T06:25:37-04:00Not what I deserve<p>I was working on a new piece entitled change before I left for treatment. Now that I’m back, I have.<span> </span></p><p>Its strange having had good health for so long to now have things wrong and doctors telling you about your condition. Don’t have much control over my condition these days. Prayer is probably the best remedy for what ails me. So many thing could go wrong and then require more rounds of medications or treatments of some kind or another. I know I am blessed to have survived the last go round with what I still have, a voice and the ability to swallow.<span> </span></p><p>I pray as the say that they “got it all.” That’s something as well, for people can spend years of their life worrying about that every day. You just have to accept it and live with it as best you can.<span> </span></p><p>The Lord has been kind to me for I have not gotten what I deserve. I suppose the way to that place, is paved with doing the next right thing. Not that we can make things right, for that has already been done for us, but that we now have a heartfelt desire to do things right. It changes everything, sometimes quickly sometimes slowly. Over time the change can become very dramatic depending on how far off the beam you were.<span> </span></p><p>Staying the course is very imporatant for on this path it’s hard to make progress with out constancy. When you fall off of it, everything and much more can and is often lost. I have witnessed this in others many times. I suppose, in one way, that is why I choose to stay close to those communities. I need to be reminded of the truth of my own situation. Namely, that I need to keep doing the next right thing and further that if I do, I can expect amazing results, for that is something that I see often as well.</p><p>Can I get a witness?</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71693352023-03-10T23:00:08-05:002023-03-11T14:51:12-05:00Grief<p>Something we must all go through from time to time but it’s not a place to live. We all have divine purpose that needs to be fulfilled and to accomplish that, we must continue to strive ahead. It is never to ignore or to try and sidestep grief. We need to go through it, but we cannot allow it to paralyze us no matter how devastating it may seem.<span> </span></p><p>Alone grief can be a powerful foe, but by using community, we will find many others that are dealing with even more difficult situations. As they say, “ You are not alone.” Your attendance at these groups can help lift others up and out of their depressive states while also dramatically helping you.</p><p>Needless to say alcohol or drugs is never a solution here. Exercise, good diet and taking care of oneself is the very best. Getting enough sleep is also a great healthy remedy for overcoming the blues.<span> </span></p><p>Grief has a way of its own, in that sometimes, we get through it quickly, while other times it never seems to go away. We must not fight it, but allow it to take its course all the while remembering to keep taking care of ourselves and those around us that depend on us.<span> </span></p><p>Grief is something we all have to experience from time to time. Keep in mind that grief is simply the result of our ability to love deeply, and that my friends, is something anyone of us can be proud of.</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71687042023-03-10T02:20:17-05:002023-03-10T02:20:17-05:00Worry<p><strong>Its crazy.. I use to never worry back in the day. Just drink my worries away, but now nearly forty years sober, I worry.</strong><span><strong> </strong></span><strong>I suppose its because I have a conscience. I wonder how my actions affect others and affects my relationship with God.</strong><span><strong> </strong></span></p><p><strong>I have heard it over and over don’t worry, pray and I believe that’s good advice, but still there are so many things to keep up with in my world. I guess it boils down to how complex do you want to make your world. More complex, more worry, less complex, less worry. Then there is always the thing about.. Just how smart are you anyway! Smarts and education play a giant factor in living life on life terms.</strong></p><p><strong>Health problems have become a major issue for me of late and that has become pretty involved. It needs to be handled, because my issues are life threatening. I have aging parents also to be concerned about and many children and grandchildren.</strong><span><strong> </strong></span></p><p><strong>Finances too are a concern. Once things are set up in your world they need to be maintained. Again how big do you want to live. What can you afford?</strong><span><strong> </strong></span><strong>Are you planning on leaving a little something when you die? Big changes life moving take a lot of energy so getting things right on your timeline is important. Hopefully your not suffering from any mental impairments, but so many do, especially as we get older. These things often are beyond our control. Now I am old so there is that concern for me and my wife. We want to make it safely through these last years. By Gods Grace, thank God where I have lived there has been no war so I have enjoyed a stable world in that regard for many years. With technology however all that can change in a moment as well, so I guess I can always worry about that if I choose to.</strong></p><p><strong>Today for me I believe a simple God directed life is a better life and sobriety is the key. As my old man use too say “If I had known I was gonna live this long, I would have taken better care of myself.”</strong><span><strong> </strong></span></p><p><strong>One day at a time…</strong><span><strong> </strong></span></p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71679152023-03-08T23:02:49-05:002023-03-08T23:02:49-05:00The Haunting<p>Sometimes I go there…<span> </span></p><p>Into the past. Kind of like a haunting. Frozen images and old worn out video clips of me and others that never change. I so wish I could change them but alas I cannot. I don’t stay long these days, because it is a only a sad<span> </span>exercise in self pity. For my own good and the good of those around me by your help I have learned where forgiveness lies. That present moment is where God resides.<span> </span></p><p>Another review for my spiritual health?<span> </span></p><p>Can I make any amends, living amends, financial or otherwise today. And the biggie that I must always ask myself. Am I still doing any of those things? Thank God, by the Grace of Christ, I have been granted a daily reprieve from my self destructive alcoholism and the power sin had over me. I no longer suffer much from the guilt and shame of the past for I have done what had always needed to be done.<span> </span></p><p>The present is my new frontier, where all things are possible.<span> </span></p><p>Don’t stay locked in the past, for it will do a fine job of ruining your life Instead, today come forward into the moment and invite the Grace of Jesus Christ into your life. He will grant you the forgivenesss and fill your life with a Joy beyond your wildest dreams.<span> </span></p><p>A simple prayer will get you there..</p><p>Lord Jesus, this is my simple prayer to you. I know that I am a sinner and that I often fall short of the glory of God. No longer will I close the door when I hear You knocking. By faith, I gratefully receive Your gift of salvation. I'm ready to trust You as my Lord and Savior. Thank You, Lord Jesus, for coming to Earth. I believe You are the Son of God who died on the cross for my sins and rose from the dead on the third day. Thank You for Your forgiveness of sins and for giving me the gift of eternal life. I invite Jesus to come into my heart and be my Savior.<span> </span></p><p>I ask this of my almighty Father, in the blessed name of Jesus Christ.</p><p>Amen. </p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71665832023-03-07T06:52:22-05:002023-03-07T06:52:23-05:00Only One Truth<p>I met a new friend online and other day. He also suffers from cancer but unlike me, He has it worse. He has no energy at all, near death, and must rely so on his wonderful wife to help him through each day. The other day he seemed angry at God. He had spent his life helping others and I guess he expected more in the end than he is receiving. I would call that being human. The idea that our works will somehow help us to achieve a greater life here on earth. I think our works will show up, but only on the other side of eternity in the second judgement.<span> </span></p><p>Life’s real experience and destiny here was almost missed by me. But for the Grace of God to have shown me the error of my ways, I would have never come to know the Lord. Without the Lord, how can anyone find their true happy divine destiny here on earth? Much like my new friend, the power that sin had over us has been removed. We have been set free. Today our purpose is to continually acknowledge God in our lives by who we are and what we do, even when we are angry at Him. We need to know He is still working things out in us. Although it may seem a long time here, it is but a blink of an eye in eternity. If your reading this my friend, know that we all go through some version of what you are going through. Fire tests metal? In reality, with our Lord, there is no test there is only Love.<span> </span></p><p>Look around you. What do you see? We see a life we don’t deserve. A loving wife and a wonderful family who loves us in spite of ourselves. Serenity, Peace and Joy in the midst of almost anything that darkness can throw at us.<span> </span></p><p>How can that be?<span> </span></p><p>It is the peace of Christ my friend. A Peace that passes all understanding, just to let you know He is with you. He is for you. Yes.. you are indeed living out your happy destiny here on earth and now by His blessed Grace we can see the truth in it all.</p><p>Christ IS with you and as we know, there IS only ONE truth.</p><p>“The Way The Truth and the Life”</p>jacob of the iWorldbandtag:iworldband.org,2005:Post/71663132023-03-06T18:03:01-05:002023-03-11T14:51:12-05:00Home<p>Having returned home things are slowly returning to normal. S L O W L Y.. It’s the age thing. I have decided to keep a daily blog going as I feel the need to stay connected online on a regular basis and to continue to relay any messages I get that I think may be helpful. I have been attending some really wonderful online groups, but unable so far to make the in person gatherings. Waiting for blood numbers to improve. I am convinced that through it all it was and is your prayers that have helped me the most. My doctors were amazed at how well I did, but we know the true answer….the power of prayer. So thank you all once again. Please feel free to leave any comments you like. I would love to hear from you!</p>jacob of the iWorldband