LIFE

No matter what, it just keeps going. It only stops when it does. Controlled chaos or as best I think I can control it. Can’t believe I use to drink so much that I would actually allowed it to get so out of control. I remember thinking in those lost days how fun it all seemed. In reality, that lifestyle was so dangerous to me and everyone around me. 

Speaking with a friend the other day I discover he had children close to death by addiction. I felt for him, because I know how powerless that can become. We try to do what we can to help our kids and then we see that behavior surface. I was there, I get it, as the parent and the child. I suppose that’s why recovery is so important to me. In the rooms I can talk with so many others who have endured that crazy life. Though their experience strength and hope I can somehow make sense of it all and come to the realization of just how precious this miracle of life really is.

At this time, because of God Grace and recovery, I have enjoyed many years of sane, rational lifestyle where solid progress has been attainable. I look around my life today and I am so grateful for all God and the fellowship has done for me. Having been diagnosed with cancer a few years back now I struggle with that. 

How life changes. Now, I want to maintain a sober lifestyle and must in order to be able to live. Doctors, heath centers, expensive medications, insurance and travel all done is varied physical conditions would be impossible without sobriety. Simple mistakes at this level have dire consequences. I must stay alert and focused to insure the right decisions are made in that regard. Yet even with all that going on, I can say without a doubt I truly love my life today. A long and winding road to be sure but, one now filled with the blessed awareness of joy supplied by our amazing loving God and all of you.

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