This section is written from eariest history to latest experience. 

To read from the beginning scroll down to “A Childs Fantasy”

ONLINE 

By this time in my story being online had become the thing. I realized rather than explain myself every time about what I did, I could just let them go to the sight and find out for themselves. 

The problem was I didn’t know anything about HTML. Over time, online vendors came to the rescue for folks who were not trained in computer languages. I found one I liked that made it easier for me to design and setup a sight. It still took a lot of work but, at least I did not have to start from scratch. 

The sight was very beneficial. Early on, it accomplished what I wanted it to do. Now, it has become a focal point of our ministry of recovery. As I aged, traveling had become more difficult and today it’s far more expensive. Over the years, I have lost a lot of my vocal ability, not that I had much to start with. So with the sight, I thought in the future as my ability to perform failed, I would still be able to write, produce and offer our music not only to a local audience but everywhere. At this writing, I have stopped playing live but, by God Grace still able to write, produce, travel and speak with groups. I supply link cards to all in attendance. Once again, God doing for me what I cannot for myself. For now, not only do we carry our musical message, but all of YOU can to, by sharing our inspirations to help others still lost. As we like to say, “ While addicted they may not listen to you but, with your help, they may listen to one of our musical inspirations sent by you! Only you know the right one to send.

CD's 

I continued exclusively writing and producing songs about addiction and recovery in studios mainly in North Carolina, Tennessee, West Virginia and California. One day speaking to a great friend, he mentioned he knew a Grammy award winning studio owner in Nashville that I might enjoy working with. I ended up booking his studio and producing the our EP  “Invisible Line”. It was really fun working in Franklin. The owner looked a lot like Paul Simon and had a beautiful studio built into his home. I found Nashville studio cats to be very good and really fast, especially when working for the demands of a Grammy award winning producer. The finished work came out super. I learned a great deal.

By that time, as I think back on it, I had produced many previous CD’s as the music came. I remember purchasing a CD replicator in the old days before our online sight was developed. I wanted to leave something with everyone I had the pleasure of speaking with. I just created my own CD’s in order to save money, for the music production, studio time, players, materials, travel, food and lodging were expensive. Later, I got so busy traveling, that I started having turn key formal CD’s produced for me by outside vendors. These CD’s had professional art covers like Invisible Line, Slow Learner, Take A Seat, Presence and others. I cannot get over all the inspiration that God has given me over the years. It amazes me to go back and listen to the older work. It gives me such joy and it just keeps coming…Thank You Lord

Three's the Charm 

I was playing  in Cocoa Beach one day. The center was hosting nurses that day to experience and understand clinical addiction. After my performance at the center I was loading my vehicle with my gear and one of the nurses came out and was watching me. I asked her for her phone number. I called and we got together. I was not looking for a serious relationship because I was afraid after all I had gone through with my last divorce. 

I know when we started dating, I was hard on her because of what I had been through, but she stuck with me, and after a few years we married. Once again God doing for me what I could not do for myself. She had been married to a traveling preacher so she understood traveling to help others. She became an oncology nurse for her pevious husbands had died from cancer.. After working in her career for some time she retired and started traveling with me as I began traveling to rehabs around the country.

I had never really performed much up to that point. In the early band days I would play out with the guys but we were young inexperienced and under rehearsed. I found out as I started to take performance more serious, that if I rehearsed the material until I could play it in my sleep, I did not  experience “stage fright” or problems during performance. My show got better and stronger to the point where I was getting standing ovations all over the country, even in Nashville! Crazy.. God was doing for me what I could not that’s for sure! Everything started to feel really divinely right for me.

New Direction 

I bought a new Roland drum machine and started trying to write and out of the blue, all these new songs materialized. They were all about addiction and recovery. I decided to perform and try out these songs for the recovery community. I spoke with a coffee house owner and set up a date rehearsed and performed one night to a pretty big crowd. It went well so I started performing every few weeks. For a few months it build up then the coffee house got flooded and closed its doors. 

At that point I got the idea, that if the recovery community got something from it, maybe I could travel to rehabs and perform for a more critical crowd, new folks trying to gain recovery. Being located on the east coast of Florida at the time, I was in rehab Mecca. I took my show here and there and it seemed to work. I expanded my area and started to perform regionally. The writing and producing took on a new God given purpose and the joy of music returned.

Busy Days 

My early years in recovery had amazing effect on my life. I borrow a substantial sum of money for a needed remodeled for our business, remarried a younger gal who wanted to have a family as much as I did. We had three wonderful children and began remodeling an old home for our new family. Life became very busy and demanding. I kept writing and playing, setting up studios at my locations to stick with my love for production but music had taken a back seat with the demands of everything else. It was a wonderful time in my life and I hoped it would last forever.

Later in life, after the children, my wife fell into a depression and started to become bed ridden. We did what we could, but nothing seemed to help. My father and I decided to selI the family business. I thought if that happened that we should move. Our town was fading and my children were still very young. I felt the change could help my wife and the kids could still restart easily in a new location. 

The business sold we moved south and began again. I invested into our new life and was hopeful things would turn around but they did not. Her depression over the next few years turned into anger. She filed for divorce and everything got torn down again, especially the children for she gained custody. I moved a short distance away and did the best I could. I was lost and very sad for some time. The music just left me. Thank God for recovery! Seemed like I had lost everything but my sobriety. I needed new focus and purpose.  

The Stand 

By God’s blessed Grace I fell into recovery after an important, failed business trip to Washington.  I came home and told my wife I was an alcoholic. At that moment she decided to leave. What I did not know at the time, was the remarkable transformation that was to occur in my life. Funny she mentioned that I was going to change but, she had had enough. I ended up giving our home to her. All the music I had composed up to this point had been written under the influence of drugs and alcohol. Mistakenly believing, as many did in those days, that it bolstered creativity.

I rented a small apartment and set up a makeshift studio to continue producing. As I learned more about my disease, I began to really love recovery. I decided to do a musical project about it. I started writing pieces that I felt reflected my early concepts of recovery and the insanity of the disease. I was intrigued at the time with a new tune from Tomas Dolby entitled “Science”. I bought the CD. The music was just really out there for the time and I loved the production, so I thought I would try something along those lines. This was the second project I had done for a cause. I got some press from it. Assiction was so real in the area where I lived. Some thought the Appalachia as the world center of addiction and I believe it was and unfortunately still is. So many there have died.

I took the new tracks I had produced to a small studio in Kentucky not far from county music highway.A lot of famous country type musical folks over the years, came from that area. Then a guy named Billy Ray Cyrus was playing around town making a name for himself. The girls loved him! I remember some gal going to see Billy Ray one night playing at the Red Fox Lounge down the road. She was very excited to go and wanted to drag me along… but I digress.

The project turned out to be a lot of fun! I started using newer digital effects on that project to try and capture the Dolby “science feel” on a poor man budget. Still new at all this I did my best. Included two tracks from that CD here on sight entitled “The Pregnant Man“ under “Dark World Concerts” under “Ludicrous” and “The Stand”. a musical work about the personification of alcohol. located under the “Lifelong Concerts” link. Those works were completed forty-four years ago.

Vinyl 

I moved from the smaller apartment into a house with space. Set up a home studio as I always did in those days. I was using a Tascam  8 Multitrack with mixer. I had met a new friend who loved music and production as much as I did and we join forces. We pressed a 45 but then decided to produce an L.P. 

We started meeting very early in the mornings for weeks to work together to complete the project. It was finished and turned out well. Sent if off out west for pressing and loved the finished product. We sold a few in the local market. It really wasn’t until much later that people called wanting to buy all I had. I guess retro vinyl had become a thing and they liked the seventy’s music and level of our production. I had won a few music contests and on that LP we included one of our our singles that made it onto a major FM homespun project in Lexington Kentucky. 

I was playing guitar, piano and synths at that time using an OBX a Mini and of course the APR string machine, that was so popular at that time. I had become very adapt at routing patch bays. Later we opened a small commercial recording studio in town and had some success but the drinking and drugging was become a bigger problem for me.

I placed a cut from that vinyl L.P.  “Inflation Devastation” on sight here under the “Concerts” link go to “Dark World” and on to the “Money” concert. I remember one summer day out at a party when someone told us that the producer for Little River Band was in town and wanted to talk to us about that song. We never made the connection. That song, released in 1980, unfortunately, is as true now in 2024 as it was forty-four years ago. God help our country!

I had become a married man by that time. My wife was very successful in television news production. Eventually she hosted the eleven as an anchor on a major network affiliate station. We were like ships passing in the night. Because of the drinking, sadly, things did not work out and we divorced. I continue to pray for her and wish her the very best!

Human Island 

At home after business school I had written and produced many musical themes. then, they called that style of music “New Age.” I decided to create a finished work to include these themes. Always a bug on fidelity, at that time, I was writing direct from midi to Betamax and later to Compact disc keeping everything in the digiital format. 

I took the files to a 24 track 2 inch AMPEX analogue studio. We ran them off in a sequence I liked and striped the multitrack tape with time code. Time code at that time was being used mainly in video production of which I had also become familiar with. Each side of the project ran about 13 minutes. The engineer and I then set up all the effects in the studio to trigger to the time code and ran live mixes of each side until we had what we liked. It was crazy we had like four guys on the board throwing faded and pushing buttons. You can hear this product under our instrumental concert link entitled “ Human Island “ That was the first time I had produced music for a cause. The monies from human island went to help the homeless in our community.

 


 

Onward 

Through the late seventies and early eighties wonderful new music technologies were being developing for the individual user. I found it all fascinating. Moved out to an upstairs apartment with my best buddy. His father, a great medical man, allowed us to live there rent free! The place was a mess so we worked hard and sort of redid the place. I worked in a corporate environment and kept attending small four to six day schools to teach me more about different aspects of the business. Musically at that time I moved all the recording gear. I had into a small room in the apartment Mulitrack recording, producing and MIDI became my focus.  When the MAC came out in eighty-four It all started coming together. Real results were slow and a stubborn at first. You had to have a lot of patience in those days. Most of the time after working on something for a long time the machines would glitch and you would lose it all. The lure of the technology was exactly what it is today, amazing new potential. I remember working with my Mac and a crazy program called MIDI paint by Bill Southworth. Wires going everywhere plugged into MIDI devices and it actually worked, with some level of reliability! I was writing and conducting musical “ symphonies “ in a bedroom! I fell in love.  It went on from there to newer work stations and software for the Mac like Didgi Design’s Opcode but the tech was so new it just wasn’t yet really reliable. Recording technology like pro tools became real, if you knew what you were doing. At this writing in 2024 truly integrated musical technologies are just really coming into their own, super reliable and flat amazing. Its been a long, hard, slow, expensive road to travel on yet, what joy I receive from it.  By God’s Grace, my hope is that I may stay alive and keep writing and producing in a way that is pleasing to Him.

Business School 

My quote for the day…

“There is a “Crazy Crowd” at every stop and village along the way, if we choose to find them”.

I went north to business school for an two year degree in marketing. As soon as I arrived I knew I did’nt want to stay but, the snow was very deep and so.. no go. My had two roommates that first year because I had to be on campus. One was a Canadian that kept an oriental girl in his bed most of the semester and the other, an rough looking stoner that started every day in his underwear with his air guitar version of “Smoke On the Water” cranked to the max. I learned some things.

The 2nd year I got a small apartment and met a great guitarist and became fast fretting friends.

Today’s Reality Note: That guitarist and close friend has died. We did a lot of music together. I think of him often and miss him very much! I believe he was a savant. He was utterly amazing at guitar and could quickly learn songs that were impossibly difficult even for legendary guitarists. He also had a real way with technology. 

I remember him telling me, right before he died, that no one was going to come to his funeral. I could just barely squeeze into the memorial because there were so many there who loved him.

My guitar friend belong to the heavy drinking and drug using fraternity at the school. So weekends started to be party time P.D.Q. Seemed everyone listened to a lot of Steely Dan up there. We would get together all the time to play and write. We actually performed a time or two, but my education somehow, came first.

My guitarist lived in a house with others guys that were real characters. A short chinaman affectionately nicknamed “Chong” a long haired biker from New York that kept working on his huge motorcycle in his bedroom! Sometimes venting the exhaust out the window and firing it up for motor adjustments. In the basement there lived a guy called “Stoneman“ for obvious reasons. It was “CRAZY” and somewhat hysterical at times. Graduated, thank God, and arrived home to start work.